Understanding and Managing Confusion and Frustration: A Mental Health Perspective for Everyone, Including CPTSD Survivors
Confusion and frustration are universal emotions. We’ve all faced moments where uncertainty clouds our judgement or where repeated setbacks leave us feeling stuck. While these feelings are a normal part of life, understanding their impact on our mental health — and learning how to manage them — is essential, especially for those living with conditions like Complex PTSD (CPTSD).
In this article, I’ll delve into the hidden impact of confusion, how frustration manifests, and practical strategies to manage these emotions for better mental health.
The Hidden Impact of Confusion on Mental Health
Confusion often stems from a lack of clarity, whether it’s in personal relationships, work situations, or our internal thought processes. For individuals with CPTSD, confusion can be even more distressing as it may trigger past trauma responses.
When Confusion Becomes Overwhelming
Confusion leads to a flood of questions:
- “Why can’t I understand this situation clearly?”
- “Am I missing something obvious?”
- “Why do I feel lost when others seem to grasp things easily?”
These internal doubts can spiral into overthinking and anxiety. The original issue gets buried under layers of self-criticism, making confusion feel overwhelming.
Personal Experience: Navigating Confusion at Work
During my career, I thrived on having clear objectives and knowing how to achieve them. However, when leadership changed, that clarity began to erode. New bosses with little understanding of established processes brought in changes based on their “fresh” perspectives.
One of the most frustrating experiences was dealing with a boss who would ask me a question but walk off before I could finish answering. It left me feeling unheard and dismissed, creating confusion about my role and expectations.
Statistics show that only 41% of employees feel aligned to their organisation’s goals, meaning a staggering 59% don’t!
Thankfully, I’ve also worked under great leaders who valued my input. These experiences taught me that clear communication and mutual respect are vital for reducing confusion and fostering a positive work environment.
Understanding Frustration: More Than Just Anger
Frustration is a natural response to confusion or situations where we feel powerless. It’s that feeling of being stuck, despite our best efforts to move forward.
Common Triggers for Frustration
- Not being heard or understood
- Lacking control over situations
- Facing repeated setbacks
- Feeling overlooked or dismissed
- Being unable to progress despite efforts
Frustration often leads to elevated stress, disrupted sleep, increased anxiety, and diminished self-confidence — all of which can take a toll on mental health, particularly for individuals with CPTSD.
Practical Strategies for Managing Confusion
1. The Power of Pause
When confusion strikes, our instinct is to rush to find solutions. Instead, pause:
- Take deep, deliberate breaths. I imagine the air going in through my nose, over the top of my head, down my spine and filling my belly and lungs with air. Then breathe out through the chest to the mouth to exhale.
- Ground yourself in the present moment. Sit back, take in your peripheral vision. Focus on the room in front of you, look out of the window and see what the weather is doing?
- Let your racing thoughts settle. Get up, move around, take your attention away from your initial thoughts.
Try this breathing technique:
- Inhale for four seconds.
- Hold for four seconds.
- Exhale for six seconds.
- Repeat until you feel calm and centred.
2. Breaking Down the Overwhelm
Confusion feels overwhelming when we try to process everything at once. Simplify the situation by asking:
- What do I know for certain?
- Which aspects are unclear?
- What small steps could bring clarity?
3. Seeking Clarity Effectively
Don’t hesitate to ask for clarification. I blustered through life and always asked questions, some people thought I was questioning them and at times this caused conflict, but I have always wanted to be clear in my head what I am meant to be doing. A respectful way to ask ‘why is to frame your questions clearly:
- “I want to make sure I understand correctly. Could you explain [specific point] in more detail?”
Managing Frustration and Releasing Control
Frustration often arises from situations beyond our control. Learning to release that need for control can bring peace of mind.
1. Identify the Root Cause
Ask yourself:
- What specific outcome am I seeking?
- Where do I feel blocked?
- Which elements are within my control?
2. Focus on What You Can Control
Instead of fixating on external circumstances, shift your focus to:
- Your responses to situations.
- Your self-care practices.
- Your boundaries and limits.
- Your next steps forward.
3. The Art of Letting Go
Accepting what we cannot change isn’t giving up — it’s choosing peace over endless struggle. This mindset shift can be particularly healing for those with CPTSD, who may be prone to hyper-vigilance and control due to past trauma.
Feeling Stuck in a System That’s S.E.P.?
Douglas Adams, in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, introduced the concept of an S.E.P. field – “Somebody Else’s Problem.” It’s a witty way of explaining how people ignore issues that don’t directly impact them.
Practical Tools for Daily Management
Incorporate these tools into your daily routine to manage confusion and frustration:
Journaling
Writing down your thoughts can help you process emotions, recognise patterns, and identify solutions. Writing it down in a different form, uses different parts of the brain, which may help reveal a solution!
Mindfulness Practices
Mindfulness keeps you anchored in the present, reducing overwhelming thoughts.
Physical Movement
Exercise releases endorphins, providing a healthy outlet for frustration. A short walk, stand up and stretch off, or even a few press ups leaning on the counter as the kettle boils pumps a bit of blood around, helps you breathe a little deeper and changes focus.
Communication Skills
Develop assertive communication to reduce confusion in relationships and work interactions. Assertive does not mean pointed fingers demanding answers, maybe phrasing a question, ‘Sorry I dont understand, could you explain again?’
Professional Support
Sometimes, managing confusion and frustration requires professional help. Consider reaching out to:
- Mental health professionals.
- Therapists or counsellors.
- Support groups.
- Wellness coaches.
Embracing Growth Through Challenge
Experiencing confusion and frustration doesn’t indicate failure. They’re natural parts of growth and self-discovery. By developing healthy management strategies, we can build resilience and protect our mental health.
Final Thoughts
A job — or any situation — should never impact your mental health to the point of distress. If confusion or frustration is affecting you, take proactive steps:
- Ask questions.
- Talk to someone you trust.
- Share your worries.
Often, simply expressing your thoughts can provide immense relief and offer new perspectives on handling challenging situations.
If you or someone you know is suffering from Complex PTSD, PTSD, Stress Anxiety or is overwhelmed at work, contact me now.